Dear me

Dear Me,

By the time you read this, you will probably be married or would have a small family. But who can say what the future holds? I thought I would be completely happy at 21. But I can’t say what I feel, because I cannot understand what I am feeling. I hope you figure out what you are feeling and are at a place where you are satisfied with yourself. How are Amma and Appa? And Anna? I hope he finds his calling and does what he does the best; being an amazing brother and a brilliant human. And what about you? Are you happy? Content? Satisfied with the life you have chosen? We took a decision to change our career paths and I have no clue what is going to happen, I hope you have got what you have always wanted. Has it paid off? Inner peace is something we always strived for; something I have always wanted, but never got. I truly hope you have gained and achieved inner peace. Are you still in contact with Her? You have always had mixed feelings for Her, and I could never tell Her about it because I am still unsure about my feelings for Her. I hope you know what she is to you, and tell Her how you really feel for her. Being a person who does not believe in giving advice, I do not know what to tell you. But, if you ever feel out of place and lost, and feel hopeless, as if you are not worth anything, remember, you are a sky full of stars (Coldplay reference, if you are still a fan!) You were once upon a time at a worse place. I still am at a bad place. But I hope you learn from it and make the most out of life. I hope you have great adventures in life and I cannot wait to live out stories and adventures! The first time I ever cried was when I came out of my mother’s womb. The latest was a month ago, when I fought with my nurturer, my up bringer; the woman whom taught me beautiful and important things about life. I hope you treat her better; better than I am doing now. I hope you make her proud and happy! You must be around 30 when you read this letter. Did you start your PhD? Do you still play badminton and football? (Even though you suck at both of them) I hope you are better at it than I currently am. Did you meet Emma Stone? Did you ask her how she danced and sang so gracefully in La La Land? And more importantly, did you meet your Celine? So many questions, and I want to know the answer to every one of them!

There is a quote form a book which is close to both of our hearts; ‘Looking for Alaska’ (Is it still your favorite book?) I think it perfectly describes what I feel when I think of you:

"‘It is very beautiful over there’. I don’t know where there is, but I believe it is somewhere and I hope it is beautiful.”

Goodbye…for now. Yours, 21 year old Me P.S: I hope you still listen to Coldplay!

(Letter was inspired by a creative writing assignment given to us as a part of our academic curriculum. The credits for the image goes to anotherbeautybabble.blogspot.com, a blogger.)

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(Celine reference: Celine is a character from the movie series ‘Before trilogy’, and the entire movie is a beautiful story of life and love. I really hope I meet and find my Celine one day!)